THE THREE FACES

The Three Faces

Written By : Sanjay Shharma

There are three versions of you.

The one the world applauds.

The one your loved ones believe in.

And the one you secretly know exists.

Which one will remain when the applause fades?

A simple Japanese saying unravels an unsettling truth:

"You have three faces. The first face—you show the world. The second face—you show your close friends and family. The third face—you never show anyone. It is the truest reflection of who you are."

In our Indian way of life, identity is never singular. We are sons, daughters, fathers, mothers, spouses before we are even ourselves. We master roles, wear masks, perfect our performances. And somewhere along the way, we forget—who were we before the world told us who to be?

The Performance of Life

As children, we are honest, unfiltered, unafraid.

We laugh too loudly, cry openly, love without hesitation.

But as we grow, the world teaches us that not all truths are acceptable.

That silence is safer than honesty.

That being liked is often more important than being real.

So we learn the art of performance.

We become the ideal professional, the dutiful spouse, the responsible parent, the obedient child.

We suppress our real emotions for social harmony.

We measure our words to fit expectations.

We smile when required.

And with every passing year, the third face—the one that is truly us—gets buried deeper.

An Unforgettable Weekend

Recently, I spent a weekend with an old, dear friend—a man of wisdom, humility, and all the worldly comforts one could ask for.

Yet, through our 24 hours of togetherness, he had only one thing to say—a message so simple, yet so profound, that my wife and I decided to act upon it immediately.

He shared it not as advice, but through stories, reflections, and gentle reminders:

"We are just souls. Every other human being is also a soul. And our father is the Almighty. If we can simply play our role—to give love, respect, and care for others—then we must leave everything else to Him. The moment we do this, life shall be very nice."

For years, we have lived believing in titles, possessions, and identities—but what if life is just a stage, and we are merely actors?

What if the weight we carry—the need for validation, the endless pursuit of success, the grudges, the disappointments—were never ours to bear in the first place?

What if the true path to peace is not in controlling everything, but in surrendering it?

That night, as I placed my hand on my heart—following the wisdom my Baubji once gave me—I asked myself:

"Am I truly living my role? Or am I still tangled in the illusions of the world?"

And for the first time in a long time, the heart responded—not with silence, but with an answer I had always known, yet somehow forgotten.

The Struggle of Silence

But not everyone gets the opportunity to reflect.

Some people live their whole lives wearing masks—never questioning, never pausing, never facing their truest selves.

There was a man I once knew—successful, respected, admired by all.

He had built an empire, raised a picture-perfect family, and never let his guard down.

But in his final years, when the noise around him faded, an uncomfortable silence crept in.

No applause.

No admiration.

Just him and his own thoughts.

And in that silence, he struggled.

Because for the first time, he had to meet himself—and he was a stranger.

His entire life had been a performance, and when the audience left, so did his sense of self.

My Baubji always used to say:

"Beta, before sleeping, just put your hand on your heart. The heart will tell you—have you done right, or are you just playing a role?"

Simple words, yet they hold the weight of a lifetime.

The Heart’s Final Question

Every night, we scroll through our phones, lost in endless distractions.

Every morning, we wake up and resume our carefully crafted performances.

But have we ever paused, truly paused, to ask—

"Am I just performing life? Or am I truly living?"

Tonight, try it.

Place your hand on your heart.

And listen.

Because in that moment of silence, you will meet yourself.

The Hidden Truth

Kabir once said:

"ज्यों तिल माहि तेल है, ज्यों चकमक में आग।

तेरा साईं तुझ में है, जाग सके तो जाग।।"

"Just as oil is hidden within the sesame seed, just as fire exists in a flint stone—

The Divine is within you, waiting. If you awaken, you shall find Him."

For centuries, our saints, poets, and scriptures have whispered the same truth—

What we seek outside is already within us.

The third face, the one we hide even from ourselves,is not something to be feared.

It is the closest version of us to the divine.

It is where true peace exists—not in the roles we play, but in the acceptance of our most unfiltered, unguarded, and untouched self.

The world will always expect a mask.

Society will always reward performance.

But in the end, when the applause fades,

the only person left in the room will be you.

Will you recognize the face in the mirror?

Or will it be too late?

The choice is ours.